Visiting the Four Virtues Park, you are greeted by this plaque which is translated into English , somewhat of a surprise. I love reading it's many wise thoughts. I also know that in this day and age you would not find a similar public posting in the West, it is too corny, too many behavioral suggestions by the authorities. But perhaps we do need to be reminded about living in harmony with all, to cherish the young, to be gentle and polite. And we should all plant some trees and flowers to brighten the day and save our environment. The virtue I want to focus on today tells me to be honest.

Before we set off for Beijing, Rabbi Darah Lerner asked if she could meet with Philip and me. We were of course very happy to see her, but understood that she also had something she wanted to tell us. This something was to realize that the first year would perhaps not be easy, that most people feel very lost and sometimes lonely being transplanted into a totally new environment. We shrugged it off, thinking how exiting it would be, so many new places to see....

Selling the house, , leaving the property, packing everything seemed to go quite easy. So I was not ready for feeling so upset when we brought my car in to the car dealer, I have never been emotional about cars, it is just away of getting around. About the freedom to come and go when and where you want.

Well, here we are, and it suddenly makes more sense. Last week we were in Shanghai and had dinner with one of Philip's coworkers. His wife is Chinese, but they lived in the US for 15 years. This whole time she begged to move the family back to Shanghai and her family, which they did last year. Her husband loves it as does her sons, but she has been miserable and homesick the whole time. For her house, her friends, even American TV shows. She said she felt as if she had lost her freedom. (She just bought a car, and feels much better)

I have to admit that those feelings are valid for me as well. It is hard to want to do something and not know how. I want to go places, but it is hard to get there, and hard to communicate when I arrive. You want to share something with a friend, but your real friends are far away, and the new ones are just that, new. Many groups are open and welcoming to newcomers, full of women in the same position, yet it takes some effort to go. But I do.

So, I look at the park poster again. Be open minded. Today we are moving into our own apartment. The crate from home arrived yesterday, and only the coffee pot was broken. It was so exiting to see my old cook books , to have our own quilts from home in what is to be our new home. We have met so many great people-they are not our "old" friends, but some of them will become our new friends. I may miss my Baja, but a new Giant bike will return some of the freedom of movement that I miss. We wish we could see you all in person, but also feel that because of e-mail and Skype you are really not that far away. With spring coming, remember to plant some trees and flowers. You may not be able to beautify Beijing, but beautify and enjoy where you are. And cherish the people around you, whether young or old.